Monday, March 25, 2013

Monday Mantra: No


mantra is a sound, syllable, word, or group of words that is considered capable of "creating transformation".

Every Monday I will post a new thought, idea, or focus for the week. When you need a breather from life, when you need a little inspiration, or when you're about to jump over the conference table and strangle your co-worker, remember the mantra.


Monday Mantra: No

What a treacherous thing to believe that a person is more than a person. - John Green
As far back as I can remember, I've been a Yes Person- you know, that person who feels the need to say yes to every invite to hang out, to every event, to every darn thing ever. But being that person has been taxing on my soul. For (what seems like ever) I've been trying to move towards being a better No Person. Someone who can confidently and casually say no without feeling the need to explain why with several bullets outlined on a PowerPoint presentation that support my decision.

After all this time I'm not much better at this "no" thing than I was years ago. And because of that, I'm exhausted. Mentally, physically, and emotionally.

It's hard to be a No Person when you love your friends and family (and acquaintances, strangers... so on and so forth) and you want them to be happy. When you try to see how important this, that, or the other thing is to them or for them and so, of course, you want that for them - whatever that is - and you say yes. But your own happiness counts- a lot. Without taking care of your needs, desires, and naps (those are very important) you end up becoming bitter, resentful, and angry- sometimes at others, but most of the time at yourself. And all you ever wanted was for everyone to be happy.

It occurred to me the other day, as I stressed myself out about a situation I have COMPLETE control over, that I need to stop these shenanigans and Just Say No. When the time is right I can say yes with 100% of my heart committed and not one ounce of me doubting or feeling like jumping off a cliff would've been a better idea.

I just need to keep practicing this no thing.

N...
Nnn...
Nnno...

No.

That was only a little hard and slightly painful and all I had to do was type it. Now for real life.

Ever have anything you needed to say no to? How did you handle it?
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