The Reflection of Shadows: Now We Know

The Reflection of Shadows

A collection of moments

Society6

Now We Know

(written to a tune)

When you left, dad,
Where did you go?
Are there buildings that shimmer, are the streets paved in gold?

How will I know?

When your time came,
What did you see?
What plans have you made for your eternity?

How will I know?

What was the price?
So much it cost,
For God to choose you and to leave us here, lost.
What still remains
Is a wife full of tears,
A longing and aching with each passing year.
How will you know, dad,
That I have grown?
When my time comes will my face be unknown?

How will you know?

All that I've wanted,
And all that I need,
Words can't describe what a heart needs to beat.
It's hard to watch
As the years pass us by,
As my mother grows old with no one by her side.
What should I do now?
Oh, what should I say?
Time keeps on passing but her pain seems to stay.

What should I know?

Unanswered questions
Have brought us to tears.
We've heard your silence through all of the years.

I hope you know.

I know you're with us
When the moments are still.
Our love remains with you and it always will.

I hope you know.

There have been bad times
And there have been good.
There have been moments we misunderstood.
There were lessons
That came with the pain,
We know that one day we'll see you again.
We know you're here,
And we know you're home-
There are no empty moments and we are never alone.

Now we know.

Oh, now we know.

All things must come and all things must go.

Now we know.

Oh, now we know.

There are no empty moments and we are never alone.

Now we know.

The Reflection of Shadows: The Plan

 The Reflection of Shadows

A collection of moments

Society6

The Plan

Life was no journey- it was a plan.
Laid out for me by my very own hands.
Designed and constructed,
So safe and so sound,
Life was no journey- it was a plan.

Life was so boring, it was so plain.
All of my planning and thinking in vain.
Nothing and no one
Could pull me away.
Life was so boring, it was so plain.

Life is much better, now that I'm free.
No map and no compass to navigate me.
No pavement or guidelines,
Just dirt roads and breeze.
Life is much better, now that I'm free.

The Reflection of Shadows: Bringing Me Back Home

The Reflection of Shadows

A collection of moments

Society6

Bringing Me Back Home

The rain comes drenching,
Pouring,
Soothing,
Washing clean my soul.

The rain: My savior,
Cleanser,
Maker,
Bringing me back home.

The Reflection of Shadows: Lacking

The Reflection of Shadows

A collection of moments

Society6

Lacking

I want it so badly it burns on the inside,
I need it so madly it tears apart my life.
I feel it so close yet it's running away,
I can see it on streets blurring past me each day.

I imagine how wonderful it must feel to have it,
I picture my arms stretched out, reaching to grab it.
I'm seeing myself fall down stairs of deceit
And I'm watching the lovers all laughing at me.

I desperately, crazily try to create it,
I dream up escape routes to try and outrace it,
I ignore it, I fight it, I curse it and fail-
I never succeed in its path of betrayal.

I've set up traps while it gave me shackles,
Leaving me heartbroken, weary, and frazzled;
It tugs me along and then cuts up my rope
And no matter how hard I try...

Love makes me choke.

It's National Poetry Month!

Hi Friends,

April is National Poetry Month, so to honor the thing I love oh-so much, all Monday and Friday posts this month will be all about poetry, poetry, poetry. As Edgar Allan Poe is my favorite poet, I'm going to jump start the month by sharing my favorite poem of his with you. 

POEtry

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Sassan Filsoof

Alone

By Edgar Allan Poe

From childhood's hour I have not been
As others were - I have not seen
As others saw - I could not bring
My passions from a common spring -
From the same source I have not taken
My sorrow - I could not awaken
My heart to joy at the same tone -
And all I lov'd - I lov'd alone -
Then - in my childhood - in the dawn
Of a most stormy life - was drawn
From ev'ry depth of good and ill
The mystery which binds me still -
From the torrent, or the fountain -
From the red cliff of the mountain -
From the sun that 'round me roll'd
In its autumn tint of gold -
From the lightning in the sky
As it pass'd me flying by -
From the thunder, and the storm -
And the cloud that took the form
(When the rest of Heaven was blue)
Of a demon in my view -

The Reflection of Shadows: I Know

The Reflection of Shadows

A collection of moments

Society6

I Know

In my dreams I see a field
Of a land that's far away,
In a country I have been to,
In a place I long to stay,
Where my daydreams often wander,
Making my pulse race and rise,
Everyday I'm closer, closer
To the soil I desire.

In my heart I feel a sorrow
That I've buried deep below,
For the past that I have chosen
And the seeds that I have sown.
In my prayers I ask for answers-
What to do next, where to go,
How to break free from the prison
Where I've locked away my soul.

In my mind I know my purpose,
Though my logic makes me question
Such a reason for my being,
Why I feel I need permission.
Though this passion burns inside me,
Thoughts of leaping leave me waiting,
Every moment spent in wondering
Is a moment I am wasting.

Monday Mantra: Pursuing Passions

A mantra is a sound, syllable, word, or group of words that is considered capable of "creating transformation".

Every Monday I will post a new thought, idea, or focus for the week. When you need a breather from life, when you need a little inspiration, or when you're about to jump over the conference table and strangle your co-worker, remember the mantra.

Monday Mantra: Make time for the things you care about

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Robert Farkas

Think back to a time when you found something you loved doing. That thing that made you feel pure and utter bliss, even in the most frustrating of times. That thing that brought you joy, that felt right in your bones.

Maybe you loved knitting. Or cooking. Or writing.

Painting. Singing. Sailing.

Acting.

Volunteering.

Traveling.

Close your eyes and tell me: What do you love? Now, tell me: Do you still make time for it?

The things that matter to you should be a part of your life. Have you lost them? Have you retained the spirit of pursuit of this thing that you love, whatever it may be?

My mom used to paint as a young adult. Landscapes, vases with flowers, animals. This was her passion. But as she got older, and as life got more complicated, she let it go. Since retiring, she's rekindled her love of art. She enrolled in a local community college course and has been taking it for almost a decade now. The same class, over and over, simply because of her love for it (and because her teacher is amazing). She only paints animals because she decided that was the only thing she liked to paint. And she's amazing, you guys. She's not just OK or passable. Her animal portraits are utterly fantastic.

In the last few years, she's created portraits of our pets, friends pets, clients pets. People are constantly asking her to create something for them. In fact, she was so backed up last year that she's still trying to catch up on requests.

She is almost 70 years old and she finally got back to the thing she loves doing.

It's painfully obvious to me that, had she had this outlet of creativity in her life all those other years, she might have been happier. But she didn't make time for it because she didn't believe she had time. There was too much house work and work-work and raising me as a single parent. There was simply too much of everything else and not enough time.

Time is an illusion, though. We make of it what we want.

Every single week, I write. Sometimes a lot, sometimes a little. I schedule it into my life. Even when I'm swamped and even when it feels like work, I write. I do this with my other passions as well. I dedicate time to travel. I fit my photography into my adventures. I create, I carve, I mold my time to encompass the things that I love.

I do not wait for extra time to magically appear because I know it never will.

Remember that thing you loved, so long ago? Go back to it. Recapture the bliss. Create a schedule in your life that allows for the thing you loved so dearly. Make. It. Happen.

You deserve a life filled with the things you want to do, not just need to do; filled with all the things you love. Not just the people you love or the paycheck that puts food on the table, but the things that make you feel more like you.

Find the time. It is there. It is tangible.

Pursue the things you're passionate about.

It's a gift only you can give yourself.

The Reflection of Shadows: With Everything

The Reflection of Shadows

A collection of moments

Society6

With Everything

With every touch,
With every kiss,
With every moment filled with bliss,
With all I've got, with everything-
I'm loving you.

With every laugh,
With every grin,
With every moment I gave in,
With everything, with all I know-
I'm letting go.

For all you're worth, for all you do-
I'm loving you.

_

This weekend marks my one year anniversary to my wonderful, amazing, ridiculously handsome husband. The man who showed me love in a new light, a new depth.

A lot of my poems are about loss and heartache because that's my preferred subject matter - always exploring the darker emotions - but this one is not. This one is about how powerful love can be. How, by letting it fully take you over, you can let go of fear, of caution, of all the things holding you back from loving with your whole being.