Every Monday I will post a new thought, idea, or focus for the week. When you need a breather from life, when you need a little inspiration, or when you're about to jump over the conference table and strangle your co-worker, remember the mantra.
Monday Mantra: Let the light in
"When the sun is shining in the sky, no matter how tight you close your eyes, the light is still there"
-Mary Bruce
-Mary Bruce
Today I realized that lately I've had my eyes shut too tightly, too much.
I've been living in a place of stress, of fear, of not caring or of caring too much. I've been living in a place of comparisons and judgement, and at the end of the day what this all adds up to is that I've gotten lost in my own darkness.
I am your typical overachiever. I want it all, I want it yesterday, and I want to be awesome at it, whatever it is. And when I'm not, when I fall less than short of perfect (which happens, oh, a lot) I panic. Quietly, internally, I am screaming from the inside out.
If I can sum all of this up, it's that as I continue to grow up and grow old, I get lost in what I believe in and what I want, with what the world believes in and what the world wants. I get stuck between logic and belief. For example, I just decided to go back to college because logically it makes sense. Logically, the world wants you to have a piece of paper saying you achieved this and this and this. Logically, I get it. What I struggle with is what I believe I'm meant to do and if this is really the right way to get there, the right place, the right path.
The problem is I want to do a lot of things with my life. I want to be a naturopathic doctor, I want to travel around the world and write stories of the people I meet and the places I've been, and I want to be a pirate sometimes thanks to Johnny Depp. There are people who make a living doing the things they love - I want to be one of those people - but I get lost in fear and in confusion of the "right way" to get there, and I get stuck. I shut my eyes.
I let logic overpower my gut instincts and every time I do that, I lose. Every single time I've done that in life, I've lost. It's time for me to open my eyes. It's time for me to trust myself again and believe, regardless of what the world thinks, that I am making the right decisions for me.
I'm not sure if the choices I'm making today are the right ones, but I have to go back to the belief that, no matter what I choose, my life will turn out exactly the way it's supposed to. Nothing I do today, tomorrow, or next year is going to change the path that is meant for me. What will make a difference - in my stress levels, my happiness, my inner light- is how I choose to feel about each and every step I take on this path called my life.
I am choosing to let the light in.
Who's with me?
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