Monday, February 8, 2016

Monday Mantra: Let It All Out

mantra is a sound, syllable, word, or group of words that is considered capable of "creating transformation".

Every Monday I will post a new thought, idea, or focus for the week. When you need a breather from life, when you need a little inspiration, or when you're about to jump over the conference table and strangle your co-worker, remember the mantra.

Monday Mantra: The path to resurrection is through release
Matthew Taylor Wilson
After my post last week I started to think people must assume I'm mad to share such intimate life stories with, well, anyone who reads them. I do share a lot of personal info on here. I share poetry I've written in an attempt to better understand myself, other people, the world. I share deeply personal things that other people would never dare even speak of. But why?

Why do I do this?

I'm certain many of you have had that thought. I know for a fact some of you have. There isn't one single reason I take this approach to my blog, but there are several specific ones.

First, let's start with why I don't. I don't do this for pity. My life is wonderful. I say that genuinely, given all the weird/sad/bad things that have happened. I like to look at it as if each and every battle I've had to fight has made me a better, stronger, more formidable opponent. Like I'm slowly becoming a Life Ninja or maybe a modern day Xena. Something awesome- I'm becoming some Awesome Battling Something or the Other.

This whole thing started as a way to practice writing while simultaneously trying to connect with like-minded people. It became a way I choose to live my life, which is to say openly and honestly. It became a way I hope to encourage others to live as well, if they so choose. I like to think of this style of writing as Truth Telling. Let me explain it like this:

A) I'm not a big fan of secrets. I realize some are good, for instance, surprise birthday party secrets are totally and wonderfully wonderful. But I believe most secrets are not. I believe most secrets are kept in an attempt to hide sad, terrible, horrible things. I believe they are dark, malicious, and dangerous- to not only the person keeping them, but others. I've seen secrets destroy lives. I've seen them destroy people. I've seen them eat away at joy and love and goodness.

B) Secrets, in my mind, go hand-in-hand with the truth. If you're keeping a Deep Dark Secret, you are most likely lying as much and as often as you have to in order to keep your secret. And lying - in most cases except for surprise birthday parties and such - is incredibly bad for everyone. Truth Telling eliminates that problem. In living the truth of all the light and dark features of who you are and what you've been through you let it all out. This may seem terrifying, but it's actually empowering. You learn to own your life in a way you never have before. You learn to rise through the ashes of whatever hell you've been through and become born again, so to speak, as a better, more knowledgeable person.

To be clear, I'm not saying I've never lied or that I've never kept Deep Dark Secrets. I surely have. And I assure you, those were some of the stupidest times of my life, which is why I'm basically on the complete opposite end of that spectrum now. Thus, all the stories you read.

No one can take what you have already given. Remember this.

What I mean when I say that is: When you take accountability for yourself, when you own who you are, it becomes that much more difficult for other people to break you down. And bad people looooove breaking other people. They like pointing our your faults and mistakes and blemishes. They like to degrade you and humiliate you and lessen you for whatever reason they see fit. They like destroying. These people - these horrible, terrible, very bad people - are weak. They're cowards. They've yet to take a long look in the mirror. They've yet to learn how to live softly in a hard world. They know not how to live an honest and forthright life. Leave them to their self destructing ways.

Last, but not least, the most important reason I do this is with hope that somewhere, somehow, I'm reaching at least one person who found some comfort in what I wrote. I hope they see someone similar to themselves that they can connect to. I hope they see someone who's been through hell and back and still wakes up excited for their life- happy and hopeful and kind. I hope they see these things and they find them within themselves. I hope they feel less alone or less scared or less awkward or less whatever. I hope, ultimately, with every story I write and every story you read, that we collectively are engaging in a process of owning who we are.

Am I mad? Am I crazy to think - in the age of Internet Trolls and horrible people who will say terrible things just to say them - that all this Truth Telling is a good idea? Maybe. 

But I'll tell you a secret...all the best people are.

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